I missed this when it was first published, but it turns out that fat people cause global warming! Reports Reuters:
Obesity contributes to global warming, too.
Obese and overweight people require more fuel to transport them and the food they eat, and the problem will worsen as the population literally swells in size, a team at the London School of Hygiene & Tropical Medicine says.
This adds to food shortages and higher energy prices, the school’s researchers Phil Edwards and Ian Roberts wrote in the journal Lancet on Friday.
“We are all becoming heavier and it is a global responsibility,” Edwards said in a telephone interview. “Obesity is a key part of the big picture.”
I concede my own responsibility. Since having a knee replaced (using up enormous amounts of energy and creating a huge carbon footprint in the process!), I’ve gained a lot of weight. So I guess I’d better contribute to one of Al Gore’s enterprises to assuage my guilt. And everyone else who’s put on some extra weight as they’ve gotten older should follow suit!
Maybe we need a government “cap and trade” program for pounds. We each get a permit for the average body weight, and have to buy more permits if we go over. Thin people could sell permission to put on some extra fat. Whaddya’ think?












Fat people contribute more? Shit, they can’t even follow their own logic. If eating more food is a problem, athletes contribute a lot more too. For example, Le Tour is going on right now. Can you imagine how many calories those guys are using? They’re biking 100 miles in a day at speeds most of us couldn’t sustain for 5. Their metabolisms are through the roof. And that’s on top of the butt ton of calories they burn by biking that 100 miles.